This word is submitted by Teresa Seputis [ts@godspeak.net]

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                      Trust That He Is Good

The Lord has been speaking to me a lot about knowing and truly believing
that He is good. It is easy to know He is good when things are going
well, but it is much harder to know deep down with total certainty that
God is good when things are not going the way we think they should go.
God wants us to stand in faith in Who He is, to believe His goodness
and to know with a certainly that rises up from our innermost being
that He loves us and that He is dependable.

There are times when the enemy tries to beat us down and to make us
believe that God is mad at us, or that He is disappointed with us. The
devil does that because he wants to prevent us from running back into
God's presence, so we can be restored. Our enemy wants to sabotage our
faith.

There are going to be times when we get empty and drained. We begin to
minister and to function from our own limited resources instead of from
God's vast resources. We continue doing our best to please God, but the
emptier we get, the more we feel that God must either be mad at us or
disgusted with us for allowing ourselves to get into this state. Then
the enemy begins to play "mind games" with us to make us feel even
worse about ourselves and our walk with God. He tries to tell us that
God won't help us when we cry out to Him because He is so disappointed
in us, and we have failed Him or let Him down. Eventually we find it
difficult to believe that God wants to restore and refresh us. We are
not aware of it, but what is happening is that out faith in God's
goodness is being systematically attacked and damaged.

I went through that for a couple of months. The emptier I got, the
harder it was to do the things that strengthen my spirit: to pray and
read my bible every day. I felt guilty about my struggle to do those
basic things and I began to feel so desperate for God that I arranged
to go on a five-day prayer retreat at a mentor's house to seek God in
hopes of being restored and refreshed.

As I began to draw into God's presence, I realized that I was afraid
of coming to Him. My head "knew" I had to draw into God, but my heart
feared that He would be angry with me or not want me to come to Him.
Part of me was so hungry to be restored to intimacy with God that I
was willing to meet His terms and conditions--whatever they were. But
another part of me was afraid that God would not want to meet me.

I set all else aside and started to press into Him, and His sweetness
began to settle over me.  I expected Him to rebuke me, and I kept waiting
for that rebuke--but it never came. I expected Him to tell me that He
was displeased with me, but all He did was love on Me and let me see
glimpses of His glory. Two days into the prayer retreat, I finally asked
Him about it. I asked Him if He was angry or disappointed in me for
letting myself get into that state.  His reply surprised me.

"Teresa, it hurts My feelings that you think I would be like that. I am
not hard to please for those whose hearts are committed to obey Me. I am
a loving Father, and I love My children. When they get empty or drained,
I don't get mad at them for it and I don't punish them for it.  Instead,
I fill them back up; I refresh and restore them, just like I am doing
for you right now. When hope is drained and My children feel they have
disqualified themselves, I don't disqualify them. I restore their hope
and I remind them of their destiny, and then set them back into it. I
don't rebuke My servants when they are weary, I revive them and I
refresh them."

Then He want on to say, "When you are feeling empty or dry or when hope
begins to fade away, I want you to exercise your faith. I want you to
remind yourself of Who I am, of what I am like--remember what My true
nature is. I am your loving Father and I am committed to take care of
you.  I want you to choose to believe in My goodness instead of choosing
to believe the devil's lies about Me. Have faith in Me--not in your
spiritual disciplines or in your ability to sense My nearness, or even
in your ability to "please" Me. Know that I am love and I cannot stop
loving you. Believe that I am good and choose to stand in faith when
the enemy whispers his lies into your ears."

"I have revealed Myself to you, and I don't change. So don't think of Me
don't attribute pettiness to Me. Trust Me, I really am Who I have showed
you that I am, and I am truly good.  Yes, I have good plans for you and
I will accomplish them in your life."